Metrosexuals

One word. Metrosexuals. Two words. They’re here. Three words. Who are they?

Remember in your American History books, Paul Revere alerted his countrymen, “The British are coming, the British are coming!” Can you think back to your US History class in high school and having to read about the British rollin’ up on Revere’s turf? Looks like history is repeating itself once again with the arrival of metrosexuals. “The metrosexuals are coming, the metrosexuals are coming!”

I did some research online and found a list of 8 signs that you may be metrosexual. I took it upon myself to do a self-assessment – for fun I might add – to determine whether or not I possess metrosexual characteristics.

1. Do gay men hit on you? ABSOLUTELY NOT! AT LEAST NOT THAT I KNOW OF.

2. Do you carry a purse? ABSOLUTELY NOT! NO MURSES, NO PURSES, NO FANNY PACKS!!

3. How do you feel about your socks? I KEEP THEM SEPARATED IN THEIR OWN BASKET. I TRY TO KEEP MY DRESS SOCKS SEPARATE FROM MY WHITE SOCKS. I NEED TO KEEP THEM WELL-ORGANIZED.

4. Do you wear tighty whiteys? HECK TO THE NAW! I DON’T EVEN WEAR BOXER BRIEFS. I JUST WEAR REGULAR BOXERS.

5. Do you use more than one product in your hair? NOPE. JUST OIL SHEEN TO KEEP MY HAIR LOOKING HEALTHY AND FRESH.

6. Have you ever used other hair removal services other than shaving? I USE TWEEZERS TO GET RID OF INGROWN HAIRS ON MY GOATEE AND IT STOPS THERE! I PROMISE.

7. Do you receive spa services? WHY YES, YES I DO. I ENJOY SWEDISH AND DEEP TISSUE MASSAGES AS WELL AS FACIALS WHICH EXFOLIATE THE SKIN. YOU KNOW I HAVE TO PRESERVE MY SEXY (thanks Diddy!) IF MY PICTURE IS GOING TO BE ON TV AND IN PICTURES…RIGHT? OK, ‘NUFF SAID.

8. Do you borrow products from the women in your life? NOT COUNTING MY MOTHER AND ROOMMATES, UM…NO COMMENT. I ONLY USE THEIR LOTION IF I AM EXTRA ASHY SOMETIMES. AND IT STOPS THERE!

Survey says, I might be borderline, if not almost all the way, metrosexual. I am very secure of my sexuality and please believe me when I say my girlfriend and I are very happy together. So there it is, we’re all good now. The entire rundown can be found at http://www.howtodothings.com/fashion-and-personal-care/a4677-how-to-know-if-youre-a-metrosexual.html

Ask yourself these questions and see which ones apply to you. Ladies, find out which ones apply to your man and go from there. Until next week, preserve your sexy!